Three “L’s”

There’s a lot of talk in magazines, blogs, television about keeping life “in balance”. When I think of keeping my life in balance, it feels like juggling, and let’s just say, I am not a juggler. Viewing my life as a “balancing act” leaves room for something to fall through the cracks. The past, that “thing” was me. My life isn’t an act or performance and the people, interests and activities in my life are not something I want to toss around.

What fits better for me is to keep my life “centered”. Things, events, people, outside stressors are going to come and go, shifting around me. If I am centered, these external events do not have control over me. When I am centered within myself, I am mindful of my reactions, my emotions and my responses and it is liberating. The tools used in coaching help guide you to finding what centers YOU. It is different for each of my clients. Sometimes it is yoga, meditation, book club, art, spiritual devotion, biking or travel. Discovering what centers you is important work that can shift your perspective from reacting to events to creating alife you love. When clients seem stuck I ask them to pick an area they most want to improve in their life and break it down into small, manageable parts. Then we take each part and apply the “Three L’s”.

Love It: If you love it, it’s working, it makes you feel expansive and whole, it stays!

Lead It: This area is “ok”, but needs attention. We brainstorm ways improve it so that it is in the “love it” category either by improving the actual area or shifting your perspective on it.

Leave It: Not working, no action steps can change it, it needs to go. Often these are people or
 events you feel obligated to, not committed to. Brainstorming and “exit strategy” to remove this energy-sucking relationship or activity is imperative to open up space for more “Love It” activities.

It takes work, a lot of big paper, sometimes a few tears, but the final product is magnificent. A life filled with all the things, people, events and activities that fuel you is a “centered” life indeed.